The Happiness Compass: What If Joy Is Trying to Tell You Something?

Exploring the idea that happiness is a compass that points us in the right direction.

We’ve all heard the old saying from the 1960s:

“If it feels good, do it.”

Unfortunately, our culture often teaches the exact opposite.

Work a job you hate because it’s practical.

Stay in a relationship that’s gone stale because it’s your duty.

Ignore your dreams because they’re unrealistic.

Somewhere along the way, many of us begin wearing our unhappiness like a badge of honor, as though misery proves we’re responsible adults.

But what if we’ve misunderstood happiness?

What if it isn’t a luxury?

What if it’s a compass?

Happiness Isn’t Random

One of the central ideas in my book, Tarot and the Art of Alignment, is that happiness isn’t merely an emotion that comes and goes.

It’s directional.

It points.

When we’re moving toward the life we’re meant to live, something inside us quietly says:

“Yes…this is the way.”

Likewise, when we drift away from our authentic nature, life begins to feel heavy, flat, and strangely empty.

Our emotions aren’t simply fluctuations. They’re messages that point us in the right direction.

The Simplest Question

Perhaps the most radical question we can ask ourselves isn’t:

“How much money am I making?”

Or…

“What will other people think?”

It’s simply this:

Am I happy here?

If the honest answer is no, don’t treat it as a failure. Treat it as information.

Your inner compass is trying to get your attention.

Isn’t That Just Hedonism?

Whenever people talk about following happiness, someone inevitably objects:

“That sounds selfish.”

Or…

“Life isn’t supposed to be fun all the time.”

I agree. This isn’t about chasing pleasure.

There’s a profound difference between pleasure and fulfillment.

Pleasure asks:

“What feels good right now?”

Fulfillment asks:

“What kind of joy helps me become more fully myself?”

Real happiness isn’t the endless pursuit of dopamine. It’s the quiet satisfaction that comes from living in harmony with your deepest nature.

Happiness Is a Side Effect of Truth

One of the biggest misconceptions in our culture is that happiness comes from accumulating enough “stuff.”

More money.

A bigger house.

A nicer car.

More followers.

Those things may be enjoyable. But they’re not necessarily meaningful.

Real happiness comes from something much deeper.

It appears when we’re living with integrity.

When our actions reflect who we really are.

When we’re doing the work we came here to do—even if that work is difficult.

Happiness isn’t the goal.

It’s the glow that appears when we’re moving in the right direction.

Entering the Flow

Psychologists call it flow.

The Taoists simply speak of being in harmony with the Tao.

Athletes call it being in the zone.

Whatever name we give it, most of us have experienced those rare moments when intention and action become one.  When life seems to go perfectly.

Time disappears.

Energy rises.

Life feels strangely enchanted.

Synchronicities seem to increase.

Everything flows naturally.

To me, this is the Happiness Compass operating at full strength. The needle of the compass isn’t spinning in circles anymore – it’s pointing solidly in one direction.

Why We Lose Our Way

The tragedy is that most of us weren’t taught to trust this inner guidance.

We were taught to obey.

To fit in. To be practical. To put duty ahead of authenticity.

Eventually the compass is still there…

But it’s buried beneath expectations, obligations, financial worries, and the opinions of other people.

Eventually, we may not even remember what genuine happiness feels like, because we’ve forgotten who we truly are.

How the Tarot Can Help

This is one of the reasons I love working with the Tarot.

The cards don’t tell us who we’re supposed to become. They remind us who we already are. They gently reveal where we’ve ignored our intuition, overridden our happiness, or wandered away from our authentic path.

The cards are about helping us realign with ourselves and answer that basic question:  Am I happy? If the answer is no, they tell us why.

Perhaps happiness isn’t something we have to chase.  Perhaps it’s simply something that we need to remember.

Adapted from Chapter Six of my new book, Tarot and the Art of Alignment: Using the Cards to Remember Who You Are, which explores how the Tarot can become a practical compass for discovering your authentic path and living with greater joy, purpose, and synchronicity.



Now available – Tarot Meditation Kits

What If Your Destiny Isn’t to Become Rich?

Exploring the idea that we’re not just here to get rich.

Spend a few minutes browsing YouTube or social media and you’ll quickly discover that almost everyone seems to know your destiny.

Apparently, you’re supposed to become wealthy.

Manifest abundance.

Drive the right car.

Live in the right house.

Travel the world.

And, of course, achieve financial freedom.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with any of those goals. The question is whether they’re everyone’s destiny.

I’m not convinced they are.

The Feeling That Something Is Missing

Most of us have experienced a quiet feeling that we’re here for some larger purpose.

Even when life is going reasonably well, there can be a sense that something remains unfinished.

It’s as though we’re being gently called toward a life that is more authentic, more meaningful, and somehow more fully our own.

But what exactly is that calling? Some people say it’s destiny.

Two Ways of Looking at Destiny

Over the years, I’ve noticed that most spiritual teachings seem to fall into one of two broad models.

The first is what I call the Earth School Model.

According to this view, we reincarnate again and again in order to learn lessons, overcome limitations, and gradually evolve spiritually.

Life is a classroom.

Every challenge is part of the curriculum.

The second is what I call the Actualization Model.

Instead of asking, “What lessons am I here to learn?” it asks:

“Who am I here to become?”

This idea reminds me of psychologist Abraham Maslow’s famous hierarchy of needs.

At the very top of his pyramid wasn’t wealth.

It wasn’t fame.

It wasn’t status.

It was self-actualization—becoming the fullest expression of your authentic self.

I find that idea deeply compelling.

The Prosperity Trap

Somewhere during the twentieth century, something interesting happened.

The New Thought movement, with its emphasis on affirmations, visualization, and the creative power of the mind, gradually merged with American ideas about success and capitalism.

Before long, spiritual growth and financial success became almost interchangeable.

Manifestation came to mean one thing:

More money.

Now, don’t misunderstand me.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with financial security.

Most of us would welcome a little more of it.

But if we believe that every soul reincarnated primarily to become rich, we end up with a rather curious picture of human existence. Can we really imagine that we’ve come back again and again because we should all be more like Elon Musk?

Imagine a shepherd whose deepest fulfillment comes from tending goats in the mountains.

Or a teacher whose greatest joy is helping children learn to read.

Or an artist who creates beauty that quietly changes people’s lives.

Would we really say that these people have somehow missed their destiny because they didn’t become millionaires?

I don’t think so.

Their success may have very little to do with the size of their bank account.

Listening for Your Own Call

One of the central ideas in my book, Tarot and the Art of Alignment, is that destiny isn’t something someone else can define for you.

It isn’t found in a bestselling seminar or a motivational slogan.

It arises from discovering your own authentic nature.

For one person, that path may indeed involve building a successful business.

For another, it may involve raising a family, creating art, caring for others, teaching, healing, or living a quiet life close to nature.

The Tarot doesn’t ask us to pursue someone else’s dream.

It asks us to discover our own.

Perhaps the real purpose of life isn’t to become rich.

Perhaps it’s to become ourselves.

And in the end, that may be the greatest success of all.

Now available – Tarot Meditation Kits

Finding Ourselves on the Map

Using the Tarot to Predict the Present

Why One-Size-Fits-All Spirituality Doesn’t Work

If you’ve spent any time in the self-help world, you’ve probably noticed a recurring theme:

Someone discovers a technique that changes their life.

Then they write a book, launch a podcast, create an online course, and explain why everyone else should do exactly the same thing.

The assumption is simple:

If it worked for me, it should work for everyone.

Unfortunately, human beings don’t work that way.

When it comes to following a spiritual path, one size does not fit all.

The Jewel Hidden Beneath the Rock

Buddhist teachers sometimes use a beautiful metaphor.

They tell us that each of us possesses a precious jewel hidden beneath a layer of gray rock.

That jewel is our true nature.

Our wisdom.

Our compassion.

Our spiritual essence.

The goal of the spiritual path isn’t to create the jewel. It’s already there.

The goal is to uncover it.

This is an important distinction.

Many of us approach spirituality as though we’re trying to become something we are not. We’re trying to become enlightened, worthy, lovable, wise, or whole. But what if our deeper nature already possesses those qualities?

What if awakening isn’t something that gets added to us?

What if it’s something that gets revealed?

Some Rocks Are Thicker Than Others

Of course, if life were that simple, we’d all be enlightened by Tuesday.

The challenge is that the jewel is often buried beneath layers of conditioning.

Those layers can include:

  • Fear
  • Trauma
  • Limiting beliefs
  • Cultural conditioning
  • Prejudice
  • Old wounds
  • False ideas about who we are

Some people arrive carrying a little rock.

Others arrive carrying a boulder.

But we’re all engaged in the same process. We’re all uncovering the same jewel.

Don’t Compare Your Journey

One of my favorite passages from the Desiderata reminds us:

“If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.”

That’s particularly true on the spiritual path.

Some people seem naturally compassionate. Some seem deeply intuitive. Others appear to have spent decades doing inner work.

Meanwhile, some of us are just figuring out which end of the shovel to hold.

And that’s okay.

The important thing is to remember that we’re all on the same continuum.

Some people have uncovered more of the jewel.

Some are just beginning.

Neither position makes anyone better or worse.

The Spiritual GPS

This brings me to one of my favorite metaphors, borrowed from Mike Dooley.

He compares the spiritual journey to a GPS.

It’s a wonderful image.

Suppose you want to drive from Phoenix to Los Angeles.

The GPS can absolutely help you get there.

But first it needs one crucial piece of information:

Where are you now?

Without that information, the GPS is useless. It cannot guide you from Phoenix to Los Angeles if it doesn’t know you’re in Phoenix.

The same thing is true spiritually.

Before we can determine where we’re going, we need to understand where we are.

And that’s precisely where many spiritual systems fall apart.

They offer directions without first helping us identify our current location.

The Real Genius of the Tarot

Most people think the Tarot’s greatest strength is predicting the future.

I disagree.

I believe the real genius of the Tarot lies in its ability to describe the present.

A good Tarot reading reveals:

  • Where you are right now
  • What forces are influencing you
  • What patterns are helping you
  • What patterns are holding you back
  • What lessons are trying to emerge

In other words, it functions as a spiritual GPS.

Before it tells you where you’re headed, it tells you where you’re standing.

And that’s incredibly valuable information.

Because once you know where you are, the next step becomes much easier to see.

The Paradox of Destiny

One of the central ideas in Tarot and the Art of Alignment is that destiny is often misunderstood.

Most people imagine destiny as something waiting for them somewhere in the future.

A distant goal.

A future achievement.

A place they haven’t reached yet.

But what if destiny isn’t waiting out there somewhere?

What if it’s already here?

What if the path is beneath your feet right now?

The future emerges from the interaction between the present and the past.

Every choice.

Every belief.

Every action.

Every moment.

The Tarot helps us see those forces at work.

It shows us how the energies of the present moment are combining to create the next moment.

In that sense, the cards don’t simply predict the future.

They reveal the path.

Finding Your Own Way

This is why I don’t believe there is a single spiritual method that works for everyone.

Different people need different tools.

Different lessons.

Different experiences.

The first step is not finding the perfect technique.

The first step is discovering where you are.

Once you know that, the path forward becomes much easier to navigate.

Like any GPS, the Tarot begins with a simple question:

“You are here.”

And from that point, the journey can begin.

Now available – Tarot Meditation Kits

Tarot and the Two Kinds of Desire:  Filling the Hole and Expressing the Soul

Exploring the sources of true happiness.

One of the major themes in my new book, Tarot and the Art of Alignment, is how to use the Tarot to create greater happiness and satisfaction in our lives.

But that raises an important question:

What do we really mean by happiness?

Most of us assume that all desires are the same.

We want more money.

We want a better relationship.

We want a bigger house.

We want status, recognition, and success.

But what if there are actually two very different kinds of desire?

And what if one of them leads to lasting fulfillment while the other keeps us trapped in an endless cycle of wanting?

Are We Really Happy?

Studies about happiness are fascinating because they sometimes seem to completely contradict one another.

On the one hand, surveys consistently show that most Americans report being satisfied with their lives. According to a 2024 study conducted by the Centers for Disease Control, the overwhelming majority of Americans describe themselves as satisfied or very satisfied.

That’s kind of astounding, isn’t it?

If that were the whole story, we might expect to step outside and find people skipping down the street singing, “Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah” and celebrating the sheer joy of being alive.

Yet another study found that 61% of Americans experience loneliness on a regular basis, with a substantial number reporting that they feel isolated much of the time.

So which is it?

Are we happy?

Or are we lonely?

Are our desires being fulfilled?

The answer, I believe, lies in understanding that there are two very different kinds of desire operating within us.

Desire #1: Filling the Hole

Wharton School senior fellow Matthew Killingsworth conducted research suggesting that money does, in fact, increase happiness.

At first glance, that seems to confirm the modern assumption that more money equals a better life.

And to a certain extent, that’s true. But . . . buried in that study is the fact that it takes a LOT of money to be happy all of the time. Billionaires are very happy campers – the rest of us, not so much. The statistics show that you have to be making at least $175,500 per year to crack into that money = happiness paradigm.

Over half of the people in the United States make less than $75,000 a year. So, quite literally, money is NOT going to buy them happiness.

The problem is that most of us unconsciously continue to believe that it will.

We begin to believe that happiness is always just one purchase away.

Maybe a new car will make us happy.

Maybe a larger house will make us happy.

Maybe the latest phone, computer, or gadget will finally make us feel successful and secure.

Sometimes these things do make us happy—for a little while. Then the novelty wears off. The new car becomes the old car. The new computer crashes. The bigger house develops problems.

And before long we’re looking for the next thing that will finally make us feel complete.

At its core, this desire is driven by a feeling of lack.

It whispers:

“You don’t have enough.”

And because you don’t have enough:

“You aren’t enough.”

This kind of desire attempts to fill an inner emptiness with outer possessions.

The problem is that the hole never stays filled for very long.

Desire #2: Expressing the Soul

There is a second kind of desire that stands in stark contrast to the first.

Rather than trying to fill an inner void, it seeks to express something that already exists within us.

Carl Jung called it individuation.

Abraham Maslow called it self-actualization.

The Buddhists speak of dharma.

Most people simply call it purpose or destiny.

This desire isn’t asking: “What can I get?” It’s asking: “Who am I meant to become?”

At some level, most of us sense that we are here for a reason. We feel drawn toward certain experiences, certain talents, certain ways of contributing to the world.

For one person, that calling may involve art. For another, healing. For another, teaching, parenting, writing, building, serving, or leading.

The details differ, but the underlying experience is the same. Something inside us wants to become fully expressed.

The tragedy is that many of us lose touch with that calling.

From childhood onward, we’re taught to fit in, conform, and follow the established path. Schools, institutions, social expectations, and sometimes even our own families encourage us to become what is expected rather than what is authentic.

Over time, we begin to forget the dreams that we felt so vividly as children. We lose sight of the deeper reason we came here. And then we wonder why life feels empty.

We don’t have meaning in our lives and so life feels meaning-less.

Alignment = Happiness

This second desire contains the secret of lasting happiness.

The more closely we align with our authentic purpose, the more alive we feel. The farther we drift from it, the more restless, dissatisfied, and disconnected we become.

This doesn’t mean life suddenly becomes easy (although it frequently does.) It means life becomes meaningful.

And meaning has a remarkable ability to sustain us even through difficulty.

This is where Tarot enters the picture.

Rather than using the cards exclusively to predict future events, we can use them as a mirror that reflects our deeper purpose.

We can ask:

* What am I here to learn?

* What gifts am I meant to develop?

* Where am I out of alignment?

* What is trying to emerge through me?

In Tarot and the Art of Alignment, I introduce a process called the Soul Reading, designed to help uncover those answers.

Once we begin to understand who we are and why we’re here, the Tarot becomes more than a tool for prediction.

It becomes a tool for alignment.

And alignment, more than money, possessions, status, or recognition, is where lasting happiness is found.

Tarot and the Art of Alignment: A New Way to Read the Cards

For years I’ve been fascinated by a simple question: What if Tarot isn’t primarily about predicting the future? That question eventually grew into my new book, Tarot and the Art of Alignment.

For years, I’ve been fascinated by a simple question:

What if Tarot isn’t primarily about predicting the future?

What if the cards are actually showing us where we’re aligned—or misaligned—with our deeper path?

That question eventually grew into my new book, Tarot and the Art of Alignment.

Of course, behind that question lies another one that human beings have been asking for thousands of years:

Why am I here?

We phrase it in many different ways:

* What is my purpose in life?

* Do I have some sort of destiny?

* Why did I incarnate in this place and time?

* Or, on particularly difficult days: What in the HELL is all of this about?

Philosophers, psychologists, and spiritual teachers have all recognized that human beings have a deep need for meaning in their lives. It isn’t enough to simply wake up, go to work, buy things, pursue pleasure, and repeat the process until our inevitable deaths.

We long for something more.

We need a sense of purpose. We need to feel that our lives matter, that our struggles and triumphs are part of a larger story. Without that sense of meaning, life can begin to feel exactly what the word suggests: meaningless.

Over time, it began to dawn on me that the answer to those questions might be found in the Tarot.

Most of us use the cards to ask questions about the future:

* What is my week going to be like?

* Should I take this job?

* Is this relationship headed somewhere meaningful?

* Am I making the right decision?

When we stop and think about it, that’s actually a remarkable process.

Whenever we lay out the cards, we operate from the assumption that we’re tapping into a source of wisdom greater than our ordinary awareness. Whether we call that source Spirit, the Universe, God/dess, Higher Self, Angels, Guides, or simply the deeper unconscious mind, we trust that the cards can reveal information we don’t consciously possess.

And if that greater source can offer guidance about a career decision, a relationship, or whether we’re headed in the right direction, then surely it can help us answer the most important question of all:

Why am I here?

That realization led me to begin experimenting with a different way of reading the cards.

Instead of asking the Tarot to predict what might happen next, I began asking it to reveal who I am, why I’m here, and whether my life is aligned with my deeper purpose.

I also began using the cards as an ongoing check-in system—a way of determining whether I was moving toward greater alignment or drifting away from it.

This book is the result.

Rather than teaching hundreds of card meanings to memorize, the book explores a different approach. It shows how Tarot can become a mirror that helps us recognize alignment, resistance, intuition, synchronicity, and purpose.

At its heart, Tarot and the Art of Alignment is about learning to see the cards as a conversation with the deeper self.

The Tarot has always been rich with symbols, archetypes, and spiritual lessons. Yet many readers become trapped in the endless task of memorizing meanings and predicting outcomes. This book shifts the focus from fortune-telling to self-discovery. The question is no longer, “What will happen to me?” but rather, “Who am I becoming?”

Through the practices and spreads presented in the book, you’ll learn how to identify the beliefs that keep you stuck, reconnect with your intuition, recognize meaningful patterns and synchronicities, and uncover the deeper purpose that has been quietly calling to you all along.

At the heart of the book is a model I call The Tarot Alignment Process.

The first step is Remembering the Call. This is the moment when we become conscious of our deep hunger for meaning and purpose. We stop drifting through life and begin to recognize that something within us is calling for a more authentic way of living.

The second step is Unveiling Conditioning. Here we examine the beliefs, fears, expectations, and assumptions that have caused us to forget who we really are. We explore the ways that family, culture, education, and society have shaped our identity—and often obscured our deeper truth.

The third step is Reclaiming Inner Knowing. Through Tarot and self-reflection, we begin to trust our own wisdom again. We learn to listen to the quiet voice within that knows why we came into this life and what we are here to contribute.

The fourth step is Entering Synchronicity and Flow. We discover how our emotions, life circumstances, and meaningful coincidences can serve as guides, helping us recognize when we are moving in harmony with our deeper purpose.

And finally, the fifth step is Embodying Destiny. Rather than seeking occasional moments of inspiration, we learn how to stay aligned over time, using the Tarot as an ongoing tool for guidance, self-correction, and growth.

Looking back, I realize that I’ve spent years exploring these themes through Tarot readings, blog posts, synchronicity, personal experience, and spiritual study. This book is my attempt to gather all of those threads together into a single framework.

Over the next several weeks, I’ll be exploring many of these ideas here on the blog, including alignment and resistance, synchronicity, the Soul Spread, and why difficult Tarot readings may not be bad news at all.

If those topics interest you, I hope you’ll join me for the journey.

Tarot and the Art of Alignment

The book is now available as an Amazon Kindle edition:

Tarot and the Art of Alignment – Kindle Edition

Or as a downloadable PDF edition:

Tarot and the Art of Alignment – Downloadable PDF Edition

Remember:

Tarot is not about predicting the future.

It’s about aligning with your true path.