Why some manifestation advice doesn’t work — and what to do instead
One of the sillier ideas floating around in the world of visualizing and manifesting is the notion that “one size fits all.”
The way this usually goes is that a manifesting guru announces they’ve been studying this stuff for decades, and they’ve refined all of that knowledge into THE ONE TRUE METHOD that will make us rich, famous, and sexually irresistible.
A variation on that is the guru was visited by beings from another dimension who gave them the real lowdown. A variation of that is that the guru is now channeling spirit guides, divine beings, angels, or ancient Atlanteans who have imparted secret knowledge for the good of all mankind.
Now, I happen to be a huge fan of manifesting, visualization, and affirmations. But there are a couple of big fallacies baked into these presentations.
Fallacy #1: One method works for everyone
If any one guru truly had the one method that worked for everyone, we’d all have signed up for that seminar by now. We’d all be millionaires. And we’d be so busy in bed we’d have to replace our mattresses every three months.
And… um… there still seem to be a lot of us who aren’t millionaires. Have you noticed?
I know that the last time I looked at my bank balance, I was shocked — shocked, mind you — to discover I still wasn’t rich.
Maybe you’ve had a similar experience.
Fallacy #2: Any method works for you
This is the one I want to dig into today: the idea that any particular method is going to work for everyone who uses it.
It’s understandable that the gurus would push that narrative. After all, the more seminars, books, and videos they sell, the more fully they manifest their vision of wealth. If they came right out and said, “You know… this might work for some of you but not all of you,” their book sales would definitely decline.
But the truth is: we’re all different, and we need to find the method that fits us best.
Dreaming Big vs. Building Bridges
One helpful concept from the psychology side of affirmations is the idea of “bridge affirmations,” also known as “ladder affirmations.”
Here’s the basic idea:
Your visualizations need to at least resemble your current reality enough that your brain doesn’t reject them outright. If you’re living under a bridge, eating beans out of a can, and you’ve just lost your can opener, it’s going to be really hard to visualize yourself living in a mansion with a butler serving you caviar.
A more realistic visualization might be:
• You have a brand new can opener
• That can opener lives in a drawer
• That drawer lives in a kitchen
• That kitchen lives in a cozy little apartment you can afford
Bit by bit, you’re bridging the gap between your present and your vision.
I won’t get too deep into the science here, but our brains have a filtering system called the reticular activating system (RAS). It decides what information to notice based on what we already believe is possible.
So if you try to visualize something your brain sees as ridiculous, the RAS stands behind you whispering: “Uh, uh. Not happening.”
“I’m a wildly wealthy kazillionaire!”
No, you’re not.
“I attract money like a magnet!”
Then why can’t you pay your bills?
“I’m irresistible to the opposite sex!”
So why don’t you ever HAVE sex?
Now, it’s possible that you are one of those super-manifesters the gurus talk about — the kind who visualizes a million dollars falling from the sky and then has to wear a helmet for protection from the cash downpour.
But if you’re not? That’s okay.
You may just be a bridge manifester, not a straight-to-the-moon manifester.
Sometimes your subconscious doesn’t need the big dream — it just needs the next step.
“Feel It Big!” Doesn’t Work for Everyone
Another favorite bit of advice from the manifestation gurus is: You have to really FEEL it.
Like, really really.
Don’t just visualize the million dollars — visualize all the wonderful stuff you’re going to buy with it.
Visualize how damn happy you’re going to be.
Do a happy dance.
Flap your arms.
Howl at the moon.
Shake your booty and cackle because you’re rich, rich, RICH, I tell you!
The idea is that emotion supercharges visualization — the more passion you inject, the faster it manifests.
But what if you’re just… not a very emotional person?
Maybe you’re a trauma survivor.
Maybe you’re neurodivergent.
Maybe you’re just a pragmatic flatliner who feels fine but doesn’t emote like a Broadway actor.
Does that mean you’re out of luck when it comes to manifestation?
Absolutely not.
Some of us don’t feel our way to manifestation — we focus our way.
That’s where repetitive affirmations come in.
What we’re trying to do is impress the visualization on the subconscious mind so that it starts working on it behind the scenes.
Yes, a giant burst of emotional energy can plant the seed deep.
But so can steady repetition — even without fireworks.
Write:
“I am attracting abundance into my life.”
Twenty or thirty times every morning.
Or listen to gentle affirmation recordings while you go about your day.
The subconscious doesn’t need drama. It just needs consistency.
Find Your Flavor
So if you’re not rich, famous, and ravishing just yet — relax.
Maybe you don’t need to “dream bigger.”
Maybe you just need to cross the next bridge.
By all means, try the big, bold, wildly emotional manifesting techniques. If that works for you — congratulations! (And maybe lend me a hundred grand while you’re at it.)
But if it doesn’t work?
Don’t give up.
Just try a different route.
Build bridges.
Use repetitions.
Focus instead of forcing.
As Ram Dass said:
“Ultimately, we’re our own gurus.”
And nobody knows you better than you.
Just the Tarot 